When I was a kid, I always wanted to grow up, because my mom can't give me whatever I asked for. So I always thought that if I grow up, I can get whatever I want. I seldom cried when I was a kid, even when I watched the saddest movie. I was called cold hearted in my family. I was too naive and way too immature back then, my life was too good, I didn't have any bad experience, so I cannot understand what the movie tried to tell me. But as getting older, life gets harder and harder. I found out that there are so many things I wish to have but I can't, no matter how hard I try. I guess it's fate, if it belongs to you, it will come to you by itself, you don't even need to go look for it. But if it doesn't belong to you, even you spend all your money, energy, emotion; it's still beyond your reach. I cried more often now, because I started to taste the hardship in life more often. Because there are more things I want to get but I cannot. Because life is not as smooth as I imaged before.
Maybe I'm not good enough for what I want. Maybe I'm too immature to ask for what I want.
Sometime, life is just so sad and frustrating.
Life is hard
